Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 26 October 2009

image for Macy Gray To Star In The Life of Condoleezza Rice
Macy Gray's brother, Bloomingdale Gray who plays the bongos in her band.

LOS ANGELES - A representative for Universal Pictures has just informed the entertainment media that the first female victim of this year's Dancing With The Stars reality show Macy Gray has just signed to portray former secretary of state Condoleezza Rice in The Life of Condoleezza Rice.

Gray's personal assistant Shavonti Richworthy told Anderson Cooper that since being eliminated from DWTS, the neo-soul, alternative hip hop singer has really been bummed out.

Richworthy said that Ms. Gray did in fact attend the anger management classes that DWTS paid for. But she added that on her fourth visit, Macy got into a shouting match with the instructor.

The 6 foot 3 inch, 210 pound Gray picked up the 5 foot 7, 145 pound instructor and body slammed him onto the hard Saltillo tile floor.

Well needless to say, Macy found herself banned from any future anger management classes.

Richworthy said that Macy usually eats two servings of meatloaf along with a dozen buffalo wings. But since being booted off the dancing show she does not eat any meatloaf at all and she is down to only eight buffalo wings a day.

Miss Richie Rich, as Macy calls her, said that interestingly it has not affected her wine consumption one single solitary bit.

Macy was scheduled to go on tour with Kanye West, but she said that ever since the Taylor Swift microphone incident, she changed her mind.

The "Bleep Bleep Girl" as she was nicknamed on Dancing With The Stars because of her propensity for cussing said that if she got on the same stage with Kanye and he even remotely tried to take her microphone away she would take it and stick it so far up his (blank) that he would have to sing into his ears to be heard.

Miss Gray will be going into the recording studio to work on her next single which is an alternative hip-hop song entitled, "Hey Len, Hey Bruno Both Of You Prissies Come Over Here And Kiss My Big Black Buttola."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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