WASHINGTON, DC (ABSNN) - President Barack Obama said the "pee-pee factor (is) up," among the "bed-wetters" among the political analysts.
And speaking of anal, "the pucker factor has really tightened," said White House Spokesman Robert Gibbs, speaking for the President before the White House Press Corps Friday.
Obama's remarks came during a forum over his embattled health care reform policies last Thursday. He laughed at the "hand-wringing, and angst, and teeth-gnashing" by those who say his reforms cannot be passed in this session of congress, if ever.
The President did say, "There's something about August going into September where everybody in Washington gets all wee-weed up."
Now, it is exceedingly rare for the President of the United States of America to comment upon the bodily processes of the body politic.
Yet, he did.
"And hey, did y'all hear Rush Limbaugh suffered a shit fit tomorrow?" the President did not ask reporters.
Gibbs, Obama's Press Secretary is the whipping boy of even the liberal "journalists" who make up the bulk of the Washington Press Corps.
"He's more embarrassing to president Obama than that ass wipe, Joe Biden," said an unnamed MSNDD correspondent known as "Wild Turkey" to his peers.
Obama recommended that the bed-wetters invest in adult sized diapers and rubber sheets because "August ain't over yet, folks!"
And even though I did, you just can't make this shit up, you know.