Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 12 August 2009

image for Adam Lambert and Kevin Skinner To Record An Album
The wind turbine on Kevin Skinner's farm which provides electricity to run two chicken incubators.

LOS ANGELES - The managers of Adam Lambert and Kevin Skinner have sent out a press release that the two singers will be going into the recording studio and making an album.

The producer of the album is the highly talented Chad Butterbeer who has produced hit songs for such noted artists as The Black Eyed Peas, The Green Green Beans, Eminem, The M&M's, Nickelback, Dimefront, Chicken Foot, Rooster Cock, Three Doors Down, and Four Windows Up.

Skinner said that he is thrilled at being able to work with such a talented feller as Adam Lambert. When asked if he knew that Lambert was gay, Skinner smiled and replied that there ain't nothing wrong with being happy.

When told in rustic terms that Lambert rides sidesaddle. Skinner smiled and said, "Heck tain't nothin'. I gots me a second cousin Cletus Bustaberry who lives down in Nutbush, Tennessee who has to ride sidesaddle on accounts of he's got a bad case of hummingroids.

I think I heard Granny Greta May say once that ole cousin Cletus also had an undescended tonsil."

Skinner was asked if they had picked out a name for the album yet. He smiled and answered "Yep we has."

He then said that they had thrown around several dozen possibilities and finally narrowed it down to three. The two that they eliminated were The Vibrating Farm Toys and Chicken Pluckin' For Fun and Profit.

The name that they chose was a little wordplay on both their last names, The Lamb-Skin Condominium

"Kentucky" Kevin was asked what the name of the first single off the album will be. He took a bite of his cornbread and replied "Well sir, it's a little song that I, you know, wrote back in May, and it's a true, you know, story that really did happen to me.

The song is kinda easy to play cause, you know, it's only got one chord. Originally I had two of 'em in there, but then I just kinda, you know, got rid of the second one cause you know I just did."

Skinner said that when he first played it for Adam (Lambert) he quickly fell in love with it. The song is titled, "We Went And Kiddingly Tasered The Pig's Butt And Now We Done Ended Up With Bacon That Just Will Not Sit Still."

Lambert said that he has really had a great time working with "Kentucky Kevin." He said that he had learned things that he had never known such as the real purpose of a cow's udder, how you can quickly find a needle in a haystack, and exactly why it is that 90 percent of all farm girls wear two pairs of panties.

Adam said that he and Kevin hope to release the album sometime in October, right around Crop Rotating Week.

Adam Lambert is managed by Simon Cowell's 19th Hole Productions and Kevin Skinner is managed by Sharon Osbourne's Red Drapes, Red Carpet Productions.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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