Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 21 June 2009

image for North Korea To Set Up A Missile Launching Pad In Cuba
An artist's rendition of what North Korea will look like if Kim Jong Il doesn't stop his missile launching shit.

HAVANA - Cuban President Raul Castro (Fidel's brother) and North Korean Democratic Republic Leader Kim Jong Il have agreed to a trade agreement.

The two world leaders met in a highly private meeting over the weekend at a Motel 6 in International Falls, Minnesota.

Cuban Leader Castro had earlier expressed to the North Korean leader Kim Jong Il via means of text messaging that his country was in dire need of rice.

He said that his island country had plenty of beans, courtesy of a 'beans for bamboo' trade agreement with Mexico.

But Castro added that they had fallen short of rice because of the increase in the number of Cuban women who had suddenly discovered rice pudding from watching Rachael Ray's cooking show.

So when President Castro texted the North Korean leader to inquire about his timetable regarding his next missile launch he was told that the North Korean missile program had run into a little snag regarding some needed parts.

Castro promptly told Kim Jong Il that he knew that there were some spare missile parts laying around the island that had been left over from the Cuban Missile Crisis of 1962. Castro even told him that many were still in their original boxes.

Kim Jong Il instantly jumped on his remark telling him that he would be very grateful to have all of the spare missile parts that he could spare.

Castro texted him back saying that he had no use for the missile parts and that he would be glad to ship them to him via FedEx in exchange for North Korean rice.

The two leaders decided to a secret meeting to discuss the many and varied ways that the two world powers (Kim Jong Il's words) could work together for the betterment of North Korea, Cuba, global warming, and video rentals.

North Korean newspapers and Cuban newspapers are calling the historic world-wide secret meeting between Kim Jong Il and Raul Castro "The Historic World-Wide Secret Meeting Between Kim Jong Il and Raul Castro."

Right bebore the meeting ended, Castro told Kim Jong Il that he would also be sending over to North Korea 2,000 of the finest Cuban Cigars.

Kim Jong Il was overjoyed to hear that. He then told Castro that on top of the 200,000 boxes of Uncle Ben Jong's Rice he was also throwing in 500 pairs of commemorative Korean War chopsticks, 100 autographed 8 by 10 glossies of Jon Gosselin, and 1,000 cases of Korean firecrackers.

Castro was thrilled beyond belief. He thought about it for a moment and he then told Kim Jong Il that he could set up a Korean missile launching pad on the island of Cuba if he wanted to.

A reporter for The Havana Bamboo-Herald said that when Kim Jong Il heard Castro's offer his eyes got the size of ping pong balls and he wet his pants.

In other news. Former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has just published her eighth book. Her seventh book was a cookbook titled, Chicken and Rice.

Her just released book is a riveting political expose titled, Wild Rice which not only spills the beans, but unveils the rice, and divulges the potato salad as well.

It is a fascinating tell-all book which deals with dozens of after-hours White House parties involving President Bush, Vice-President Dick Cheney, comedian Jaime Foxx, Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh, John and Cindy McCain, Gretchen Wilson, Neil Young, three of the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders, Cloris Leachman, Yankee superstar A-Rod, and talk show host Ellen DeGeneres.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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