Written by Frank Cotolo
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Tuesday, 29 June 2004

image for Bush to edge Kerry, poll says
Bush by a neck.

CORCUPONIA, Wisc. -- A new poll released shows that if the general election were held today, tomorrow would still be the day after election day.

However, that same study shows that George Bush would beat John Kerry and win a second term by only forty votes and one electoral vote.

"The people polled went for Bush like a racoon to a bail of dirty hay," said pollster Edward Smiley.

With a margin of error of one to two, if not four to five and maybe ten to twenty points, the results didn't make either candidate think differently about the campaign.

"I plan to do exactly what I have been doing, only more of it," said Bush.

"I plan to keep pushing and getting my message across, no matter what message that is," said Kerry.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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