Written by Frank Cotolo
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Tuesday, 29 June 2004

image for Kerry in a landslide, poll says
Our next president.

CORCUPONIA, Wisc. -- A new poll released shows that if the general election were held today, people would believe it was election day.

However, that same study shows that John Kerry will win by a landslide.

"The people polled went for Kerry like a racoon to a bail of dirty hay," said pollster Edward Smiley.

With a margin of error of one to two, if not four to five and maybe ten to twenty points, the results didn't make either candidate think differently about the campaign.

"I plan to do exactly what I have been doing, only more of it," said Bush.

"I plan to keep pushing and getting my message across, no matter what message that is," said Kerry.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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