Written by Frank Cotolo
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Tuesday, 29 June 2004

image for Bush in a landslide, poll says
Bush will slaughter Kerry.

CORCUPONIA, Wisc. -- A new poll released shows that if the general election were held today, no voting machines would be ready at the polling places.

However, that same study shows that George Bush will win a second term by a landslide.

"The people polled went for Bush like a racoon to a bail of dirty hay," said pollster Edward Smiley.

With a margin of error of one to two, if not four to five and maybe ten to twenty points, the results didn't make either candidate think differently about the campaign.

"I plan to do exactly what I have been doing, only more of it," said Bush.

"I plan to keep pushing and getting my message across, no matter what message that is," said Kerry.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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