Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Britney Spears

Friday, 10 April 2009

image for Britney Spears Suddenly Walks Off Stage
Britney Spears performing in Vancouver, Canada, moments before she left the stage because of the smoke.

VANCOUVER, Canada - The Britney Spears Traveling Three Ring Circus Tour hit a speed-bump in Vancouver.

The pop diva suddenly walked off stage after performing just three songs. Initial reports said that Miss Spears left the stage because there was just too much smoke in the air.

A spokesperson for Spears, Tahiti Byford, said that some of the smoke had a funny smell to it, kind of like what she imagined marijuana smoke would probably smell like.

She stated that the real reason that Ms. Spears left the stage was because she had to pee real bad. And so she quickly left the stage before she accidentally wet herself which would have caused quite a dangerous puddle on the stage.

Miss Byford added that the reason that Spears did not return to the stage was because there was a very long line waiting to get into the women's restroom.

And so by the time that Britney did get into the restroom and managed to pee, she ended up signing over 200 autographs.

Spears manager, Josiah Tarwater, said that after she finished signing the autographs Britney was extremely tired, thirsty, and hungry so she went back into her dressing room.

Britney was immediately given a Diet Pepsi, a bucket of KFC chicken, and a washcloth.

A spokesman for the Britney Spears Traveling Three Ring Circus did not understand why the concert goers were so unsympathetic and downright rude.

He added that just because a performer has to pee is no reason to start yelling some of the horrible things they were yelling like, "Hey, where did the bitch go?" "Hey, where did the friggin' prima donna go?" and "Hey, where did the messed up little F'ing diva go?"

When Ms. Spears heard about the awfully mean things that her fans were saying she replied that she would never again ever perform in Vancouver, Iceland.

When told that Vancouver was actually in Canada, Spears added that she would never again be performing in Iceland or Canada either.

In other news. Radio and television talk show host Glenn Beck has been banned from traveling in 39 of the 50 states because of his first degree arrogance, sarcasm, and anti-Obama remarks.

Beck has easily surpassed Bernie Madoff, Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh, and Dick "The Dick" Cheney as the most hated person in the nation.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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