Written by Ned Earley
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Topics: bailout, AIG

Friday, 20 March 2009

image for US Bailout Check to AIG Bounces
Pay to the order of AIG: One Hundred Seventy Billion Dollars and zero cents....NOT!

Officials inside the Obama Administration have privately confirmed that the $170bn bailout check issued by the US government to AIG has been returned for insufficient funds.

A rueful and embarrassed President Barack Obama acknowledged that, due to an oversight, there was not enough money in the checking account when he wrote the AIG bailout check. The oversight occurred when he neglected to deduct a $273bn check previously written to aid Pakistani guerrillas. That check had already been cashed by guerrillas, rumored to be sympathetic to US interests, at a PayDay Loans and Check Cashing outlet in Karachi.

When reached by phone, a low level salaried spokesperson for AIG stated, "The arrogance, hubris, and incompetence demonstrated by the US government in sending us a rubber check is beyond belief. All of our corporate executives are presently attending a two month business meeting in the Cayman Islands. With the bailout and bonus money gone, we no longer have the funds to bring them back. Who is going to pay for that?"

An unnamed US Treasury Department official said that the problem has now been exacerbated by bank NSF returned check charges approaching six figures. The official also indicated that the US may explore a solution to the problem by taking out a loan from AIG when, or if, the AIG executives return.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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