Paris Hilton, chairman of the World Airhead Society, and for some very bizzare reason, known only to readers of trashy gossip magazines and newspapers without much news in (but plenty of bare breasts), a famous person, has announced that she is definitely a virgin again.
Reports in some of the serious newspapers attempting to fill space on page 7, which co-incidentally is her IQ, made quite a mockery of this serious announcement, but our reporter, St Johns Barkingmad, obtained classified documentation from the Beverley Hills Disney Hospital where she was being treated, to confirm it.
Signed by her surgeon in residence at the hospital, Dr Michael Mouse, it confirms that Miss Hilton is indeed a virgin once more.
It appears that when Miss Hilton does find Mr Right, he will have to be prepared to accept that any children will be as a result of an immaculate conception, even though this may result in a birth in the top suite of a posh 5-star hotel rather than a barn.
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