Written by Morse
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Sunday, 4 January 2009

image for Another Jimmy Carter Legacy: Free Homes Built on Dump Now Ready for DEMO!
Defective Houses Constructed By Jimmy Carter Destined for Another Dem Demo Pile!

Fairway Oaks/Swamp Land, Fl./ American Builder Magazine - A subdivision built in 17 days spearheaded by former President Jimmy Carter, financed by Hollywood Liberals, and built by A-List Volunteers is ready to be recycled due to shoddy planning and workmanship.

In yet another liberally minded project with good intentions,funded with Other People's Money , and inadequate oversight, residents say the 8 year old houses are rotting around them causing illness amongst their families.

An investigation after the fact indicates the subdivision was build on a rubbish pile, with uncompacted garbage several feet deep leading to unstable foundations and leaching of harmful waste products.

The ACLU, while disregarding leadership, management and oversight shortcomings, has demanded a bailout of the project by the House Banking Commission headed by Barney Frank, and blames Republicans for not declaring the site a "Disaster Area" prior to construction.

GOP spokesmen said their efforts to halt the project were blocked by DEM leadership in the House and Senate demanding more affordable housing for their voting base, even if it was only "temporary."

In a Biological Review Assessment Procedure (BRAP), initiated by the ACLU under a $15M grant issued by HUD, the 6 year study has found that over 98% of the garbage was generated by Republican Constituents, while 100% of the inhabitants are registered Democrats, leading to additional discrimination law suits by the ACLU.

Meanwhile residents say doors and windows leak, siding and shingles are falling off, and fire ants, rats and mice are finding no trouble invading the houses.

A certified building inspector called in to check the construction said basically, "these people really didn't know what they were doing. There's roof rot, loose plywood, inadequate nailing, faulty framing, and the walls are not close to being plumb, let alone being square...a totally amateur project!"

Meanwhile in California, Barbra Streisand, who was in charge of a roofing crew, said about the building experience, "It was tons of fun...we want to do it again as soon as they tear down those shit boxes!"

Make Morse's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this


Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 2 multiplied by 5?

1 10 3 13

Go to top ^