Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Sex, Prostitutes

Friday, 5 December 2008

image for Guilderland Woman Held On Prostitution Charge
Give him his bus fare, bitch!

A woman is under arrest on prostitution charges after a man who had paid her for sex was so traumatised, he tried to extort money from her.

Schoen LaBombard, 41, was duped by the prostitute, and is recovering at home with his wife and children after the incident.

Betty Slapp, 33, from the UpMe Escort Agency met Mr LaBombard, an investigator for the Albany Court Sheriff's Department at a hotel for sex and blew his mind so completely, that the unfortunate copper felt he was unable to drive, and asked her for his bus money home.

When she refused, laughing in his face, he increased his 'offer' to $2,500, and threatened her with a visit from the Feds. He showed her his Sheriff's identification, and told her she was under surveillance but that he liked her and would let her go if she gave him his fare.

Again she refused, this time threatening to trap his cock in his zip if he didn't leave immediately, and an argument ensued. Eventually, another prostitute happened by, and gave Mr LaBombard 3 dollars, and he left.

The trouble didn't end there, however. Slapp repeatedly called the investigator and offered him sex, which he refused.

Over the weekend LaBombard informed his wife about what was going on, and she contacted the Sheriff's Department, asking that Slapp be "brought in".

On Monday, six armed officers booted-in Miss Slapp's back doors, and managed to restrain her. They 'interviewed' her in the bedroom, living room, kitchen and bathroom, but were unable to extract any information from her.

She was then taken naked to the police station for 'further questioning'. Slapp's attorney, Mr Darren Rewlich told us she had been "shafted".

Today, Slapp was arraigned in the town court and remanded to the Albany County Jail without bail.

Slag.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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