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Topics: Death, Illinois

Monday, 24 November 2008

The body of Leeroy "Belcher" Bleecher, 25, of Altona was found just outside the Masonic Hall Sunday and concerned citizens of this small Illinois town are demanding that Sheriff Grover Giddy "do something..anything" to find out what caused this tragedy.

"Most people round hyar (Spit) believe it was a initiation ceremony gone bad", stated one citizen, one Leeroy Smith, who asked that his name not be given. "I could be next, if you know what I mean (Spit)."

Bleecher was pronounced dead at the scene according to Coroner Williard Jones. "I'd say he was at the doornail stage and getting close to a mackerel by the time we got there", said Jones.

Meanwhile the autopsy revealed that there was a considerable amount of goat urine in Bleecher's body and his buttocks were badly bruised.

Sheriff Giddy stated that this is the second body discovered in the past year with the presence of goat urine and black-&-blue buttocks.

"The first one we found was behind the old Oddfellows building, wearing only his underwear and covered from head to foot in peanut butter and feathers."

"These aren't your everyday homicides", concluded the Sheriff Giddy. "Could even be a serial type thing."

Lately several citizens have reported hearing goat bleatings coming from somewhere near the Altona Beaver's Lodge.

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