Written by Robert W. Armijo
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Saturday, 8 November 2008

image for Barack Obama apologizes to Nancy Reagan; Dionne Warwick and her "Psychic Friends Network" say they knew he would
Barack Obama reaching out for the Old Republican Guard (not the neocons)?

Washington, D.C. - Hours after his first appearance as president-elect in which he made a passing reference to the Reagan administration consultation with astrology in the White House to make executive decisions, Barack Obama called Nancy Reagan to apologize for braking with tradition and stating a historical fact during a live national press conference.

"I called Mrs. Reagan for whom I have the utmost respect," said Obama. "And I apologized to her for citing historical fact, assuring her it would never happen again."

Reportedly, Mrs. Reagan accepted Obama's apology and then unfortunately proceeded to place her cat in the dishwasher.

"He sounds like such a nice man," said Mrs. Reagan over the din of a cat's persistent howl. "I hope I get to meet him one day. So that way we can sit-down to a cup of tea and read his future to him. Excuse me a moment. I have to put Mr. Tidily Winks through an extra rinse cycle, because we're going to have company, only not John McCain."

Meanwhile, across town, Dionne Warwick, and her "Psychic Friends Network", called a press conference of their own, claiming that they knew Obama would be calling Mrs. Reagan before he did.

"I knew he would call her to apologize," said Mrs. Warwick. "And not just because I'm a psychic but because he is The Obama. As foretold in the prophecy, one would come from among us and yet his name from far away. He alone would be able to reach across the great divide that is within us to unite us all."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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