Written by Jalapenoman
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Monday, 25 August 2008

image for Democratic National Convention Opens
Biden has the qualifications that Obama lacks...all of them.

The Democratic National Convention opened in Denver, Colorado to excited shouts of "Obama, Obama, Obama" from the press rooms. Outside of the media areas, tones were still excited but also a bit controversial.

The number one topic of discussion involved Hillary Clinton and her place in the party. Lines were evenly drawn betweeen those who felt that she should have a cabinet or supreme court position and those that felt that "Billary" should "just shut her fat, bitchy mouth, admit she lost, and go away."

Senator Joe Biden was also a big topic of discussion since the announcement that he would be the Vice Presidential running mate. Nay Sayers were quick to point out that he has run for the nomination the last each of the last seventeen elections and no one seemed to care about him then. Supporters, however, wished to make known that he would balance out the ticket as he actually has some qualifications to be president (as opposed to Obama, with none).

At the request of Senator Obama, all sessions will be opened with dual prayers by Reverend Wright and a local Mullah from a Colorado mosque. All participants and delegates will be required to face Mecca during the Islamic prayer.

For security purposes, it was not revealed where Obama would be staying, but it was learned that another multi-million dollar house was donated to him by a special interest group for consideration.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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