Written by Jen A. Taylia
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Topics: George W. Bush, sick

Wednesday, 28 April 2004

image for George W. Bush Heals the Sick and Raises the Dead.
Stand Up and Walk!... Oh, you are standing up. My bad.

In an unconventional move yesterday, President George Bush pushed aside the formalities and etiquette of public greeting and began blessing people and casting out evil spirits.

Confusion and Panic seized the crowd as W. laid hands on people, many of whom fainted and lay on the floor speaking in languages that nobody could understand.

Religious leaders are in uproar, and for the first time since the creation of The Constitution are pushing for stronger separation of church and state.

Responding to criticism a spokesman for the White House released the following statement.

"It is not the Presidents intention to cause offense, he is merely sharing something that is very important to him. What's the difference between shaking someone's hand and saying Thank you for coming and Rise up, your sins are forgiven?"

Polls show that many people now believe that President Bush has indeed been sent by our Heavenly Father, but there is much debate about what he has been sent for.

Right wing conservatives believe it is to bring a new era of Christian values to the U.S. but the general consensus is that Bush has been sent to follow in the footsteps of his earthly father, and only serve a single term in the White House.

Political advisors agree. They believe that if he keeps this up, voters will crucify George W. on November 4th.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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