Written by Chuck Terzella
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Topics: Iraq, America

Thursday, 8 April 2004

image for Donald Rumsfeld: Me Chinaman!
"Chow,chow,chow,chow,chow"

April 8,2004

Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, in an effort to take America's mind off the carnage that is currently being wrought in Iraq proposed at a press conference today that everyone make funny faces. "We need to laugh more," said Mr. Rumsfeld, doing a credible silly Chinaman face, "Sure we've lost thirty or so of our bravest young soldiers in the last three days, bombed a mosque and killed dozens of Iraqi's. Sure, the situation is falling apart, but isn't that exactly the time to cut loose and have some fun?"

Other members of the Administration were quick to endorse Rumsfeld's proposal. Secretary of State Colin Powell has taken the hilarity one step farther by dressing up as Mae West, a move that actually has been causing some concern among the higher levels of the White House Staff. Scott McClellen, the Presidents Press Secretary, was quoted as saying, "While we are solidly behind Secretary Rumsfeld's idea to make America chuckle, we most certainly do not advocate senior members of the Presidents Cabinet dressing in women's clothing, unless of course they're Elaine Cho, Gale Norton or Condi Rice and to be honest, I'm not really sure about her. She's a bit too Butch if you ask me.

This story was approved by Wegman (Pudgy) Waterhouse

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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