Written by Madison Cade
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Sunday, 23 December 2007

image for Athiest to Strike at Fuel Pump
Oil Industry - Pumping Up The Kindness

Washington, DC - Michael Newdow, the Sacramento, California atheist who sued to remove "under God" from the Pledge of Allegiance, has now struck out after the oil industry.

In a suit filed last week in the District, Newdow named all four major oil companies and several independent oil leaders as damaging his sense of independence and personal thought by forcing him to press a button which tells the automated system, "no thank you" after being asked if he would like a discounted car wash.

Specifically, Newdow claims that the automatic response at over 85% of our nation's fuel pumps, does not give him the opportunity to say what HE would like to express, i.e., "shove it, it's gonna rain," or, "no idiot, or my 'carnivores suck' bumper sticker will peel."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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