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Sunday, 26 August 2007

image for E-legal?
The controls of an American jail?

No-one needs the death of twenty four American children resting on their conscience. No one needs it but due to a new internet based game many people have got it.

The game involves making decisions about whether or not a psychopath should be let out into the American community based on records given to a normal parole officer. You then get to watch what happens to your nutter when he gets his hands on a gun. He will then invariably go and shoot some school children.

What many people do not realise is that they are actually in charge of Americas prisons and are all taking part in a all new initiative from the American government to reform their legal system.

The project set up nine months ago by president Bush has certainly made sure that American prisons are almost always empty, however is this a good thing.

We spoke to doctor David Tenant about this."Oh well, I don't know much about psychology myself but it seems pretty bad doesn't it. I mean I'm not a doctor myself." We said to him 'Liar' but he refused to comment further.

But what can be done to make those Americans realise that they are destroying themselves from the inside like a mad dog in a small china tea pot which has been injected with so many drugs that it is moving enough to break concrete.

We decided to go and sort it out our selves, converting the Bush administationi with our own inventifricationified wordifications. We managed to bluff our way into the White House, however we could not talk to the president since he was in the bath. Instead we had a look at his computer to see what his plans were.

Unfortunately before we could quit Lego racers we were discovered and sent into an American prison. Fortunately we were subject to the E-legal system and were released back into the community.

However on the forms we filled in at the police station I, with a magnificent speed of mind, wrote a computer virus in binary from memory, specifically designed to destroy the on-line prison related nightmare. When our case was dealt with, the computer sent the code into the data base and wiped its systems.

So all Americans can thank me that they are no longer threatened by psychos with guns, and that they no longer have an mesedupifricated legal system which allows a five year old from Derbyshire to release a mad man from jail.

So is this a sign of just how the justice systems have changed in the last twenty years and is the British legal system, once the envy of the world, now a sadly rearranged heap ,of gorilla droppings similar to that in the US? Who can say. But one thing that is for sure is that it is.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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