Written by Andy Tattersall
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Friday, 30 January 2004

image for U.S Leader Shocked Over the News that he Isn't the First American President Called Bush
Bush regrets not attending school classes

U.S. leader George Bush has voiced his astonishment after finding out that he isn't the first American President to carry that name.

Bush, speaking from his ranch in Texas, was said to be in a state of denial after finally finding out that the man he had called pappy all of his life, had once led the United States of America in its quest for world domination.

The baby-faced leader said: "I find it shocking that our intelligence agencies should fail to find out these facts and therefore jeopardise my position as the Grand Imperial Wizard of Americaland".

"The first I knew was when I saw footage of my Pappy parading around in desert fatigues.

At first I thought it was my myself, as I've been working out a little at the ranch and have successfully lost a few pounds."

"But then it hit me and I realised that I'd never wear combat gear as it causes me to come out in a funny rash. I called Vice President Chainey and he broke the news to me that I wasn't actually the first President Bush."

Bush junior was also knocked-back by the realisation that he wasn't the first Bush to start a war with Iraq and that previous U.S presidents had attempted to be the first to start World War Three.

Bush said: "That really annoyed me, I've been working really extra-hard over the last thee years to start a world war. I tried it with everyone, with the Chinese, the North Koreans and even the English."

"But It's only now that I find out that we'd tried on a few occasions before, with the Russians and the Vietnamese, wherever that is", Bush added.

Bush went on: "I really wish I'd gone to those history lessons instead of working on my pappy's oil wells. I used to see my mommy and pappy on the television but they said they had walked onto the screen by mistake, I never knew that all along they had been lying."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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