Written by Tom Taylor
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Wednesday, 28 February 2007

image for Trapped girl fights firemen while waiting for media attention.

Tracey Chambers, 6, single-handedly fought off three firemen who were attempting to free her arm from a pipe earlier this morning.

Local News was supposed to be on the scene to film her release for the nightly 'feel-good' piece but was unfortunately delayed by a homeless man's touching relationship with a duckling.

Tracey, who had always wanted to be on television, screeched, "They just kept trying to pull it (the arm) out. What was the point of getting it stuck in the first place, IF IT WAS JUST GOING TO BE OUT BEFORE THE CAMERAS GOT THERE?"

"She's a very lucky girl..." claimed Sergeant Hodges of the local Fire Department, "...after about fifteen minutes of struggling, I just wanted to leave her stuck there."

According to Sergeant Hodges, it was clear that she called the news service before putting her arm in the pipe.

"I'm still not sure who called us in, as her trapped arm was still holding the phone."

However, the six year old was not to have it all her own way, despite the news arriving in time to film Tracey's moment of contrived joy, they opted to air the duckling story.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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