Written by Wayne Davis
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Friday, 31 January 2014

image for Dolly Parton: Are you sure Justin Bieber is not from Alabama?
Parton no fan of The Bieber

County superstar Dolly Parton is no fan of Justin Bieber and thinks he makes the rednecks back in the Ozarks look like Ralph Lauren Models.

"What is up with this kid and his parents?" an exasperated Parton said after a recent concert in Nashville. "I'd be kicking that little punks behind with my six inch heels". Parton went on to say that she is shocked at the horrible influence Justin's father is having on him. "Just because you can have kids, don't mean you should" Parton said with her trademark laugh.

Parton will soon be teaming up with Macklemore for a new anti douche bag campaign which will feature exclusive video of Justin and his Dad picking up pre-op transexual hookers in Toronto. "I hope our outreach program can help steer Justin back onto the right road" Parton said as she signed autographs.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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