Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 13 January 2014

image for 19 Members of A Senior Citizens Home In Idaho Taken To The Hospital After Engaging In A Twerking Contest
Rita Jo Ziffy said that twerking made her lips pucker up uncontrollably.

POCATELLO - The director at Pocatello's Au Gratin Potatoes Senior Citizens Home, Artie Knoxmelon, 49, has apologized to the families of 19 of his residents.

Knoxmelon told the news media that he had seen Miley Cyrus twerking on a television show and he decided to have a twerking contest at his senior citizens home.

He stated that a total of 23 residents entered the contest (15 females and 8 males).

He then said that he had all 23 participants stand in the middle of the recreation room and he told them that as soon as he started playing the Beatles song "When I'm 64" they were to start twerking and a panel of 4 unbiased judges would decide who the best twerker was.

Knoxmelon remarked that he started the song and all 23 participants began twerking. He then noticed that two immediately stopped and started complaining about back pain.

A few moments later he said three more stopped and before the song was half over a total of 19 of the participants had to be tended to.

Knoxmelon said that he and three employees loaded all 19 residents onto three SUV's and they drove them to a nearby hospital.

SIDENOTE: Artie Knoxmelon said that all 19 residents were treated and released except for 98-year-old Winnie Daggerdill who was held overnight because she said that one of her molars and her crotch region was hurting.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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