Written by Olive Pepper
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Thursday, 26 December 2013

image for Voyeur Offended by Exhibitionist
That exhibitionist has a lot of nerve

Ever since she caught him peeking at her through her bedroom window, Eric Snower's neighbor has been bending over backwards---and bending over every other which way!---to catch his attention. And that's just disturbing.

"I'll be the first to admit I like looking at women when they're dressing and undressing and taking showers," says Snower, a self-avowed voyeur who has outfitted his house to be a virtual surveillance outpost, with binoculars, one-way window film, and cameras with telephoto lenses. "But to think that someone is getting their kicks by purposely stripping off their clothes and pointing their rear in full view of you is just beyond the pale. I have half a mind to call the police---or maybe a psychiatrist."

Snower says he was delighted to discover shortly after he moved into his house that he could see into his neighbor's bedroom. Even better, she often left her curtains partly open, and after only living in his house a week he caught her opening her window for some fresh air while she was nude.

He made it a point after that to keep tabs on her bedroom window. Then he learned he could see into her bathroom from behind one of the bushes in his backyard. It didn't hurt that she always kept her bathroom blinds up and seemed to like to keep her shower curtains open as far as she could without letting water get on the floor.

"I just assumed she was a sun worshipper, because she was always sticking her head out the window, especially on sunny days. And, of course, she sunbathed in her backyard practically every weekend during the summer."

His neighbor's sunbathing was especially satisfying, because it was almost like a strip tease just for him. "She would come out in the early afternoon in her bathing suit, when the sun was at its peak, and put on sun screen. After about 20 minutes or so she would take off her top, and then usually she would take off her bottoms shortly after that. I liked it best when she had a friend over, because usually they would both get naked."

This Shangri-la disappeared, though, once the two of them locked eyes while she was in the shower. Snower said he had made the mistake of trying to get a closer view and she caught him red-handed---or, he might say, red-faced.

"I was surprised she didn't yell or scream or throw the shower curtain closed," he said. "Instead, she kind of snickered and bent over to get her shampoo, basically pointing her rear right at my face. After that, I knew she was a weirdo.

"To think you have this person exposing herself like that, it's just disturbing," he went on. "I mean, I could be anybody. I could be a nutcase. What is she thinking?"

Snower says he's considering moving, because he just isn't comfortable living next to someone who would flaunt her body the way she does. Plus, there's a house for rent not far from where he lives now that's next to a very attractive woman he's dying to see naked. "She would present a real challenge, but I think I've learned enough at this house to figure out how I could exploit some vulnerabilities in her privacy perimeter. In any case, she's attractive enough for me to give it all I got. But whether I succeed or not is less important than just getting away from this very sick woman I'm living next to now."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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