Speaker of the House of Representatives, John Boehner was apprehended this morning after police observed him sniffing bicycle seats at a LGBT rally on the mall in Washington DC.
Boehner appeared to be intoxicated when a reporter from the Washington Post spotted him as he exited the local courthouse. The journalist pushed his way past aides to the Congressman.
Reporter: "Speaker Boehner, is it true you were apprehended at the rally for sniffing bicycle seats!?"
Boehner: "Yesh," (burp, giggle, sneeze/fart) "Thash what they shay!"
Reporter: "Mr.Speaker, why would you do that?"
Boehner: "Jesh trying to find out if thesh perverts are like the rest of us" (burp, giggle, sneeze/fart)
Reporter: "What did you discover?"
Boehner: "I think I know (burp, giggle, sneeze/fart) where Eric Cantor wash this morning! Hypocrite jerk off!"
Reporter: "Anything else?"
Boehner: Yesh" (burp, giggle, sneeze/fart) and with a mischievous grin, "I think I found McCain's tricycle!"