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Thursday, 24 January 2013

image for New NASA video issued over Scottish 'Mayan Calendar' Doomsday scare
Royal sucker: 'it's either the Loch Ness Monster or its daughter Queen Elizabeth'

Washington - "Just a routine precaution, guys," NASA head of Doomsday debunking Dr Tamara Hexoplasm commented, "in case any remaining Mayan apocalypse peddlers latch onto this latest hoodoo about the rescheduled End Of The World."

The new video disclaimer rubbishes apocalyptic Scottish predictions carved into an ancient Celtic lump called the Stone of Destiny.

Weighing in at 336lb the 26 inch x 17 inch x 11 inch meteorite is also known as the Coronation Stone and has felt the weight of royal backsides on it ever since hosting its first enthronement of King Edward the Stoned.

Armageddon touters reckon some weird prophetic hieroglyphs carved into its structure are syncretic with the Mayan Calendar.

Last December millions of Doomsday wannabes were hoaxed by the Mesoamerican artefuct into believing the 2012 Winter Solstice would bring Judgement Day on Earth.

The latest scare claims tomorrow's Burns Night will see the death of an alien impostor who has leeched the wealth of nations to succor a sprawling brood.

"It's either the death of the Loch Ness Monster," online odds-makers Aintgottaprayer.con commented on the fast-breaking story, "or it's daughter Queen Elizabeth."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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