Written by queen mudder
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Sunday, 25 November 2012

image for Paranormal activity sees Madonna ditch her Ghostbusters Building apartment
She felt dogged by phantom pregnancies at the spooky apartment block

New York - "The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man stole hundreds of pairs of her Agent Provocateur undies," is how one Central Park West realtor put it as Madonna's stunning $23.5million duplex came onto the market, "no wonder she had to have her, er, vajazzle exorcised after splitting from Sean Penn."

The fifth/sixth floor condo occupies a prize spot in the Ghostbuster's Spook Central Building at 55 Central Park West and has a paranormal history that's said to have inspired the classic 1984 supernatural comedy.

Madonna and ex-husband Sean Penn lived in part of the duplex during a brief and often turbulent marriage before 'some sort of spooky hexoplasm' crept in from the ether and the Material Girl dumped him for all that 'baseball bat thump' stuff.

Last week an Upper West Side Kabbalah rabbi performed a full bell-book-and-candle exorcism on the palatial apartment to spiritually complement Madonna's tasteful $1 million magnolia suede 'n' black marble makeover.

"Whoever buys this wonderful duplex is bound to be a Ghostbusters fan," the building's co-op board spokesperson said today.

"It's got terrific views on the Jackie O Reservoir as well as a nudist colony's palatial hot tub roofgarden near The Frick Collection on Fifth Avenue, Upper East Side."

A powerful long range digital telescope is included in the asking price.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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