Written by b kenneth mcgee
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Wednesday, 11 April 2012

When Rick Santororum bowed out of fhe presidential race yesterday, the media immediately began seeking a comment from Newt Gingrich. He was nowhere to be found! As the journalists frantically tried to find him, one enterprising reporter did a Google search and Gingrich's name was totally absent! "It is as if he never existed," said the incredulous reporter.

The blogoshere is rampant today with rumors of the Gingrich disappearance. In one instance a grainy video clip on utube shows a man of indeterminate age and origin sitting in a darkened room in Islamabad, Pakistan, watching a small black & white TV. Apparently, it is a vampire movie with English sub-tittles. The anonymous comment with the clip states that the three women in the background are Gingrich's wife Callista and his two ex-wives. In the clip you can hear them softly chanting "He is the Walrus, goo, goo g'joob." In other news, an anonymous source within the US government reports Karl Rove's super pack (American Crossroads) has contracted with the Navy Department to hire Seal Team Six for an unknown assignment. The same source reports the code name for their assignment isÂ…"The eye of a Newt." Rove denies the rumor.

In related news, a journalist from The New York Times tracked down the former campaign manager for Gingrich. He was living in a homeless shelter in Newark, New Jersey. When approached, the man looked wary and his eyes darted from side to side. Asked about Gingrich,he said he didn't really know him. "Don't recollect I know him," the man stated. "Wasn't he Speaker of the Hose, many years back?"

Reporter: "Do you mean Speaker of the House?"

The man with a noticeable tic in his right eye, replied, "Not the way I recollect it!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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