Written by Gregamemnon
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Monday, 5 March 2012

image for Idaho Cactus Enjoying Accidental Time In Spotlight
Republican Candidate Newt Gingrich says he wants voters to know he's always loved cacti, and all things planty and green.

BOISE--With talk of the March 6th Idaho Caucus picking up, a surprising figure has inadvertently risen to the forefront of internet searches. Lookups for "idaho cactus" and "idaho cactus info" have risen over 600% in the past few days alone.

The top result, according to Google, is for a website by the name of "funidahoplanting.com", a website founded back in 2003 by self-proclaimed green thumb, Marge Schuster, after she claimed to have "gotten fed up" with her friends always giving her a hard time about her hobby not being as "fun" or "exciting" as knitting, or as "beautiful" and "historic" as that really extensive button collection Betty Donner from down the street keeps bragging about.

While many claim the increased attention that and other similar sites are receiving lately is simply due to the common misspelling of "caucus", not everyone is as convinced.

"Plants can be cool too, you know," said an annoyingly-giddy Mrs. Schuster. "Especially ones like the 6 foot barrel cactus, or Ferocactus Wislizenii as those of us who've studied botany would say. I think people are just finally beginning to realize just how fascinating and engaging gardening can be."

Most political experts, however, believe all this cactus business will blow over as soon as Republicans can decide upon a single candidate to run against "Barrack O'bamma" this fall.

In related news, the lone cactus in Alaska was struggling to cope with all its newfound fame, and according to local sources, has maliciously pricked several pets and small children, and has since ceased to store moisture in its fluted stem.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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