Written by Adam Click
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Topics: chicago

Wednesday, 25 July 2012

image for Pilot Blinded by Solar Panel Crashes Into Compost Pile
Pilots are being cautioned to keep their noses up after a compost fire closed Chicago's O'Hare International Airport.

Chicago,IL-Efforts to go green at the nation's busiest airport have met with tragic results when a C-7 Cargo jet crashed on approach to O'Hare International Airport after the pilot was blinded by the reflection of sunlight off of a solar panel array while under visual flight rules.

The incident cast a pallor on not one, but two environmental initiatives at the airport: the solar array designed to supply power and heat to airport terminals, and a nearby large scale compost operation where airport waste was sent to be recycled.

The plane crashed into one of the compost piles which subsequently burst into flames, closing the airport and spreading a stench across the Chicago skyline the likes of which have not been experienced since the stockyards closed in 1971. To make matters worse soot from the fire settled on the solar array, severely limiting it's heat and power generating capacities.

Trying to make lemons out of lemonade officials have announced that the plane and all it's contents will be plowed under to make more compost. Any ash recovered will be stored and used on icy runways next winter. Said one official: "We look forward to using the results of this incident to enhance the effectiveness of our green initiatives."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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