An exasperated local man has described TV and radio weather reports as nonsense.
Mr Danbert Plebiscite, of Spandex Gardens, Pittsville, is so fed up with the weather forecasts that he e-mailed a friend, Nobby, to complain.
EIF News & Features has seen a copy of the e-mail, in which Mr Plebiscite tells his chum he is "sick and tired" of the "crappy weather" and "those idiots predicting it."
In the document he says: "Last summer was supposed to be all barbies and what happened? Think we had one.
"Now they're telling us that the weather is 'rather unsettled.' Rather unsettled? What a pile of bollocks!!! It's bloody settled alright - bloody settled on being bloody crap!"
Mr Plebiscite's e-mail has been forwarded to his MP who said to be "completely uninterested."