Former editor of News of The World, Rebekah Brooks, has announced that she has gained new employment and will be leaving the media industry imminently.
Brooks, 45 from Wapping, approached a reporter for The Spoof in the street outside a mobile phone companies head quarters just outside Newbury and said "I work for these guys now, but keep it quiet until I change my mobile phone answer-phone across from News Of The World."
Our reporter duly obliged and accidentally dialled into her answerable, changed the message on her behalf and then sent this story.
It appears that Mrs Brooks has failed to give the appropriate notice to her previous employer News International Rescue that she is going to become the new Head of Hacking Complaints for the unnamed mobile telecoms provider (to save their embarrassment) and will be ruling on whether customer complaints that their Vodafone was hacked into fairly or whether there is fraudulent individuals at work.
Honorary Complaints Director, the Minister for Telecoms, said "We are pleased with this appointment, it gets her out of our fucking hair in Westminster and maybe she can hack for good instead of evil for a change."