Written by Skoob1999
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Friday, 8 July 2011

image for "Do You Know Who I Am?" Mystery Blonde Screams At Basingstoke Station
Train Or Car? The Mystery Goes On.

There was some confusion today among commuters arriving at Basingstoke Station, as they found themselves confronted by a mystery blonde woman in the ticket hall, acting strangely.

The woman, suspected to be the mystery blonde who has recently been the subject of intense press speculation, apparently screamed out at the top of her voice:

"Do you know who I am?"

One man, who thought he did know who she was, asked our reporter if it was indeed the mystery blonde who has been splashed all over the media recently? Skoob News affiliate, Martin Shuttlecock, explained that it probably was.

"What was all that about?" one bewildered briefcase bearer enquired. "I only came up here to get a train ticket, and find myself being screeched at by a mystery blonde woman, demanding to know if I know who she is. Bit of a silly question if you ask me - I mean, if she doesn't know who she is, how can she expect me to know?"

Further investigations involving detailed questioning of Doris, who works behind the counter in the buffet on Platform One, appeared to confirm that the woman was indeed the mystery blonde who has been the subject of intense media interest recently. The mystery blonde was apparently wearing a little black dress, an Armani jacket, and Loboutin heels.

Like the woman spotted on board a cross channel ferry, and seen shopping at Aldi's in Fareham.

"She got in a car with a bloke in a suit," Doris explained. "Then they shot off down Alencon Link. They could be headed anywhere for all I know."

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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