Written by Katarina Frogpond2
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Sunday, 24 April 2011

image for Dr Who Fans say "Next Doctor, Please.  Matt Smith has Gone Too Far."
The Tardis taking off into space

A survey of 2000 Dr Who fans has revealed that they have very grave concerns about the current Dr Who. They find him unbelievable and not very in keeping with the traditions of previous Dr Who's.

They also believe he's an actor. And not a proper Shakespearian actor either...but a careerist actor who is paid to be the Dr. Previous Dr Who's never got paid. They just did the show for love, but this one seems to be in it for the money. They also believe he is using the show to further his career...in AMERICA.

These shocking revelations led to a secret meeting of Top Dr Who Fans at a prominent location in London where even worse revelations were revealed.

It is only fair that at this point I take the opportunity to warn you that some of these revelations might cause distress to true Dr Whovians, so please don't read on if you are of a sensitive nature.

Amonst the revelations revealed were terrible tales of how fans had seen Matt Smith at Glastonbury in normal clothes. They've also seen him in glossy magazines with an IT girl, trendy, model, type partner. Dr Who fans say that's not accpetable. The only girl friend for a Dr Who professional actor is a geeky sci-fi girl who may or may not have teleported to earth on a spacehopper.

Matt Smith has also been seen at the local supermarket buying a pint of milk, down the pub having a shandy...and worst of all walking a dog that appeared to be real, and not made of a metal box and a television antennae like Dr Who's are supposed to have (ie Not K9).

The Dr Who Fans say that his behaviour is intolerable in Sci-Fi Circles. They say its "NORMAL" and Normal is not what Dr Who's are supposed to be.

They have petitioned the BBC to send Matt Smith to America, and then find them a proper Dr. Preferrably they would like one who resembles Rowan Atkins or Sir Patrick Moore... or if the worst came to the absolute worst Professor Brian Cox would do.

Obviously Professor Brian Cox is still a bit too commercial looking to be the Dr, but at least he'd know where to find Gallifrey on a map...and sometimes whilst watching his show on the telly I sometimes, just sometimes, get the impression he may also have been there for real.

By Katarina Frogpond.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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