Written by Ellis Ian Fields
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Topics: Nick Clegg, Boxing

Thursday, 7 April 2011

image for Nick Clegg "Not A Punchbag" Confirms Expert
Not Nick Clegg. Nor is the bloke.

Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg has been complaining about recent stinging criticism.

In response to vitriolic attacks he said: "I'm a human being. I'm not a punchbag - I've got feelings."

He makes the comments in the latest edition of New Statesman magazine in which he also admits to crying to music.

Boxing trainer, Jack Literal, says that the deputy PM is probably right about not being a pugilist's training device.

"Look, you asked me this once before - about Dannii Minogue. I told you then that punchbags are usually dirty brown leather things that hang from ceilings in gyms.

"Nick Clegg doesn't look like that to me. And I've certainly never seen a punchbag that cries when it hears music. Mind you some of the crap they play in gyms these days - well it makes me want to cry!

"You know what I heard the other day? Some dancified hippy hoppy or whatever you call it version of Bridge Over Troubled Water. Fair done my head in it did."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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