Written by Neil J
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Friday, 22 October 2010

image for Rooney in U-Turn shock!

In an amazing U-turn - Wayne Rooney has decided to stay in Manchester for another five years.

This just two days after the 24-year-old hitman claimed " the city's failure to attract world-class prostitutes to Old Trafford area prompted his decision to leave."

But after talks and a demonstration by irate prostitutes at Rooney's house in Prestbury last night, he was persuaded that their own ambitions matched his own and he has decided to stay.

"This is wonderful ,I just never saw it coming" said local prostitute Ethel Higginbotham (age 57). "After all the cuts announced this week and the raising of retirement age, this is a just the news we needed "

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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