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Wednesday, 22 September 2010

image for Desperate Parents Build School In Own Back Yard
IMBY Please!

A local council has approved plans from a couple looking to rebuild a leading primary school in their back garden.

Harold and Pandora Smythe-Montesquieu, from Surrey, who have recently had their first child, were encouraged to act after struggling unsuccessfully to move into the catchment area for the county's top primary school. In an example of what is being dubbed IMBYism, the couple took offered the school a very generous package to rebuild the school, including a new state of the art gym and horse riding stables, inside their own 300-acre property.

"What other choice did we have?" said Pandora in response to complaints from the other parents who have now all been informed that their children are no longer within the catchment area themselves and will need to look for another school. "We are only doing what any right-minded, even-handed, doting, success-obsessed, neurotic, upper middle class parents would do for their children".

It is expected that the trend will now become widespread with experts predicting that within the next 5 years, over half the schools will be within the properties of over-zealous parents.

"Of course it will be expensive" said Harold, but he was quick to stress they would also be saving money too - "we will be saving petrol money as we won't need to drive her to school and of course we will save on our phone bill, as we wont have to phone the school every hour to check on our child's progress - we can simply stand outside the classroom windows and see for ourselves".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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