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Wednesday, 15 September 2010

image for Air Traffic Control warns Pope Force One against flying via Pan Am 103 Lockerbie path
Carrying illegal contraband such as endangered species snakes, blood diamonds and off-the-peg Kruggerands?

Scotland - (Fly-By-Night News): The ancient Vatican Heirlines Tupolev-154 is an exact replica of the 30 year-old rust bucket that carried tragic Polish President Lech Kaczynski RIP in April this year.

Its projected route over Scottish soil is scheduled to follow the doomed airpath of the Boeing 747-121 Flipper Raid of the Holy Sea.

The US jet exploded over Lockerbie on the 1988 Winter Solstice in what is Scotland's worst ever peacetime atrocity.

Meticulous preparations this week have so far found no dodgy Libyan terrists in the current Papal loop.

But MI6 sources reminded police today that they always suspected Lockerbie bomber Abdel-Basset Ali Al-Megrahi 'is Pope Joe Ratzinger's son'.

At Edinburgh Airport officials refused to be drawn into whether the international ban on carrying dodgy in-flight liquids - such as Communion Wine or Holy Unguents - remains in force for Papa Ratzi's trip.

"Border Agency cops might frisk him, of course," a security source said today, "just to check for illegal contraband such as endangered species snakes, blood diamonds and off-the-peg Kruggerands."

The possibility of the Pope being a drugs mule hasn't been entirely ruled out, however.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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