Written by IainB
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Tuesday, 31 August 2010

image for Sting accidentally kills three burglers

A Wiltshire home was the subject of a police investigation yesterday morning after three burglers were accidentally killed while taking part in a burglary there, despite intense security surrounding the Victorian home.

The home, belonging to ex-Police superintendent Terrance Forsdick of the Wiltshire constabulary, had been targeted on several occasions before, with numerous valuables taken. Because of the repeated robberies at the property, and the fact it belonged to a retired police officer, a sting operation was put into place to catch the miscreants in the act.

Extra CCTV was installed, along with motion detectors and a team of police officers hidden around the house. After three nights of police overtime the burglers struck.

"The three thieves were seen entering the property at about ten in the evening," said Detective Inspector Phil Inns, who is the godfather of the detective in charge's daughter. "Our brave officers waited until they had broken in through an upstairs window before giving chase through the property. All three managed to get out of the house and were chased across the grounds, before they climbed a wall at the north end of the grounds."

Unbeknownst to the criminals, the drop on the far side of the wall is sixty feet onto the A350, a busy main road bypassing Kingston St Michael. Three three died instantly on being struck by a truck. The coroner is expected to rule death by misadventure.

A reporter for the Wiltshire Commercial newspaper was said to be desolate that Police front man, Sting, was not involved in anyway, despite what the headline led him to believe.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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