Written by Bill Licks
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Topics: Susan Boyle, Cats

Tuesday, 24 August 2010

image for Susan Boyle throws a cat in a bin
SuBo Dreams A Dream, Tiddles has nightmares.

Crazy Celtic crooner Susan Boyle found herself in hot water today after she was caught on CCTV throwing a cat into a wheelie bin.

SuBo was filmed walking past a house in Coventry when she stopped to stroke a tabby cat. Then after checking if anyone was watching, she picked up the helpless moggy by the scruff of its neck and dumped it in the bin.

Fans are shocked by SuBos behaviour as they believed she was a cat lover. She has previously admitted in interviews her fondness for felines and it is rumoured she donates 50% of her earnings to the Cat Protection League.

A Facebook page has been created by the owner of the cat showing the CCTV images and hundreds of comments have been posted by angry fans threatening to take revenge on SuBo.

Police have already offered Boyle protection from the public and have advised her to go into hiding for a few weeks and maybe change her identity until the publicity dies down.

A spokesperson for Boyle said 'Susan is extremely embarrassed and is very sorry for throwing the cat in the black bin. Next time when she sees a friendly cat sitting on a wall minding its own business, she'll be sure to throw it in the green bin so it can recycled as a door stop or a kebab or something'

This isn't the first time ex British talent show contestants have been involved in animal cruelty over the past year. X-Factor winner Leona Lewis has allegedly been spotted dumping black bin liners full of cute, fluffy Scottish terrier puppies into the Thames. And Irish twins Jedward were recently caught in the Ring Tailed Lemur cage at London zoo stealing the primate's nuts and grapes and smearing each other in monkey shit.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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