Written by Monkey Woods
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Monday, 19 April 2010

image for Volcano Dust Emanating From Gordon Brown's Arsehole
Brown -responsible for volcano dust?

The volcano dust that has wreaked havoc with European air travel over the last seven days, is not coming from the Eyjafjallajoekull volcano in Iceland, but is, in fact, pouring forth from British Prime Minister Gordon Brown's arsehole, it has been reported.

Sources in Iceland itself, have said that the Eyjafjallajoekull volcano story is a hoax cooked up by the British government and supported by the BBC, which has flooded international airwaves with archive pictures of acrid black smoke gushing into the atmosphere.

The Icelandic source I spoke to said:

"This volcano is as quiet as a mouse. I was up there last night with my pet giraffe, and there is no black smoke to be seen anywhere."

But this afternoon, reports emerged from 10 Downing Street that Mr Brown could well the source of the volcanic ash. An eyewitness who was sightseeing in the area yesterday reported 'a pall of black smoke' pouring out of the chimney pot on the roof of Number 10, and called the local fire brigade.

Members of the Cabinet arrived and left Downing Street all through the night, and an official announcement on 'the state of the volcano' is expected later today.

A spokesman said:

"The public always seems to think that incidents like this are the government's fault. Earthquakes, tornadoes, floods, mudslides, tsunamis, football hooliganism, global warming and so on, so why not volcanoes?"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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