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Wednesday, 20 January 2010

image for Liverpool to send help to Haiti
A scouser, yesterday

Liverpool are to send much needed help to the people Haiti. Eighty five shellsuited helpers from the Liverpool Supporters Club drunkenly boarded a DC10 at Liverpool Paul Ringo Lennon Airport today on a mission to provide much needed support to the already stretched team of looters at work on the devastated island.

The team of professional thieves, con men and armed robbers will be looting as early as Thursday morning whilst aid workers struggle to help others around them. Terrence Terryson of Toxtech said his team hope to get some stereo cassette decks, fake Nike T-shirts and possibly some traineeeees from the devastated shopping centres.

Many of the professional looters were trained in the Toxteth riots of July 1981 and have been offering global looting services ever since. They had 3 teams deployed in New Orleans when Hurricane Katrina hit in 2005 and looted over $150,000 worth of goods. If you visit the streets of Liverpool today you'll still see many people wearing New Orleans Hornets basketball jerseys, a souvenir of the looting expedition.

Looters will never walk alone, Terrence added.

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