Written by Skoob1999
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Topics: Britain, Snow, Flooding

Thursday, 14 January 2010

image for Battered Brits Braced For Floods As Snow Melts
How Britain Might Look when The Snow Melts

A warning of severe flooding in low lying areas was issued today as the heavy snowfall of the "Big Freeze" starts to thaw.

For beleaguered, battered, and bewildered Brits, such a scenario would be just the latest in a catalogue of ruinous events.

Householders in flood risk areas were today barricading their doorways with sandbags and loudly cursing their lot.

"It's been a right old year for us," grumbled Harold Worth of Chichester, West Sussex. "We had the summer heat and the flies, Susan bloody Boyle, the Jackson chappie popping his clogs, I'm a Celebrity, Strictly, Celebrity Big Brother, a new Doctor Who, blizzards, travel disruption, Jonathon Ross and Wogan throwing the towel in, and now we're going to have to cope with flooding. I despair, I really do."

Mr Worth, 96, then fell to his knees sobbing his heart out.

Which made us feel proud to be British.

More mayhem as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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