Written by Nick Hobbs
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Saturday, 9 January 2010

image for Doctor Who's New Assistant "Not Ginger"
Racist in the police box? Yes I think so...

Still reeling from the outrage caused by Doctor Who confessing to being 'anti-ginger', things seem to have gotten worse for the two-hearted Time Lord.

In a shock discovery made by this journalist, the Doctor's new assistant is none other than Nick Griffin.

The leader of the BNP is set to join the cast in episode three of the new series. Griffin said "I really like the concept of Doctor Who, always been a huge fan, I do feel he should maybe have a passport though. I mean just turning up in our country is a bit off, but at least he earns his keep."

Anti-Griffinites have set up a protest outside Television Centre in London. Margie Dingwall, protestor, said "it's abhorrent that the BBC, funded by the people, should see fit to put a man with his background into a children's prime time viewing slot."

"I mean, what next?" she continued, "Gary Glitter to host 'Children Say The Funniest Thing's'? Pete Doherty to host 'Blue Peter'?"

Bobby Zapher, long time fan of the show and pro-BNP supporter, said "I think it's great that Doctor Who will finally be a voice for the BNP. The character of DW has always had something missing, racism. Now that void is filled, and anyway, at least Nick's not ginger."

Russell T Davies was unavailable for comment, he was out burning a large cross on his estate.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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