Written by Blazing Saddle
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Topics: Economy, Flying, Airlines

Tuesday, 15 September 2009

image for Sleazyjet To Invite Passengers To Act As Crew
Chippy Scouse Sleazyjet Customer Service Rep watches 2009 cutomer queue

Sleazyjet, the well-known economy airline has taken a giant leap in cost-cutting.

From now on, when you check in online, you will be asked if you wish to volunteer to fly the aircraft, act as cabin crew or baggage handler.

In the event that insufficient volunteers come forward for each flight, the flight will be cancelled and the fees charged to the passengers.

The only restricted job will be that the crewmember who handles the cash (toilet fees, sickbag rental, excess handkerchief fees, dodgy sandwich money etc) will continue to be an Sleazyjet employee.

A spokesman for the Liverpool based Sleazyjet operation said "Our passengers have repeatedly expressed a desire that Sleazyjet employess take running jumps. They do not realise that starring in Airline, the blockbusting documentary, has inflated our egos to the extent that we really do not give a shit any more".

When asked how customer service and safety would be affected by the new regime, the spokesman said there would be definite improvements in all areas.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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