Written by Earl Grey
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Topics: Science, Genetics

Wednesday, 8 July 2009

image for Human Sperm Created In Newcastle Laboratory
If Only You Could See What He Was Doing With His Hands

Scientists have made a major breakthrough by creating human sperm. However, the claim is not without some controversy. Critics have claimed that it is not genuine human sperm and there are also those who believe that scientists should leave well alone. Roy Fredericks said "We should not be tampering with the laws of nature. They will create an abomination next."

There is also some doubt as to the unique nature of the discovery. There are those who believe that human sperm has previously been created in Newcastle. Malcom MacDonald said "I've created human sperm before, round the back of the chip shop with the lass who works there. I don't know what these scientists are on about. They think they're so clever, but I can beat them with just a copy of Big Momas Mams any day of the week."

Scientists responded by claiming that the sperm they have created has no impurities, unlike other Newcastle sperm. Professor Jeremy Coney said "We believe that we can create a higher being. we could change Newcastle for ever. We may even be able to develop language skills."

There are those who argue that the scientists will burn in hell for messing with God's creation. Others argue that Newcastle has little to do with the creativity of God.

For now scientists have retreated to the gents with a copy of Big Butt Monthly.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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