Written by Leonardo Picasso
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Tuesday, 21 April 2009

image for Susan Boyle to be Cloned for Deep Space Exploration
Space Bats Attack ISS over Antarctica 2003

Susan Boyle, this is your life. The science world is in a clamour as the main glamour spot in who will be cloned twenty two times to form a team of deep space cosmonauts is revealed. Susan Boyle was chosen today to boldly go where no brow has gone before. She will or should I say her clones will spend extended periods of time in space, possibly indefinitely as they continue onward to the edge of the universe.

The Susan Boyle Team might have to fight space bats in order to keep on schedule for her intergalactic trade mission, it is hoped that space bats will have there tiny ear drums shattered by the collective voice of 22 Susan Boyles singing. There are some fears that the Van Allen Belt might sear off the Boyle teams eyebrows, so special space helmets will have to be developed.

In a recent invitation received by NASA through the SETI program a command performance has been requested by the Queen of the Moon Ants. The Moon Ants have revamped the Apollo landing module into a sound stage for the performance.

It is hoped that the Boyle Team will also take on the arduous task of ongoing negotiation of a treaty with Globule Commune of Jupiter, they will also be negotiating future trade deals with the Plutonian Dust Mites.

From there The Boyle Team will continue towards the Galactic Fountain at the centre of the Milky Way and using the gravitational force of this white hole propel themselves out of the galaxy.

Onboard more Susan Boyles will be cloned, to replace the aging Boyles on this extremely long journey. Meanwhile the real Ms Boyle will charm earthlings with her voice while getting comfortable in her new digs at Clarence House.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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