Written by Earl Grey
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Saturday, 18 April 2009

image for New Police Powers To Be Rushed In By Government
More Bobbies On The Beat

The Government has decided to introduce new Police powers following the incidents at the G20 protests. After one death and two complaints of Police brutality, the Government is to act. From now on the Police will have the authority to kill and maim any leftie/greeny/anarchist type person and any passers by. It is thought that the leading banks are prepared to make a financial donation to help arm the police.

"I am pleased to announce these powers" said Jacqui Smith, "The police will now have the legal right to uphold the law and crush any enemies of the state."

Human rights activists have called on the government to back down. However, this now seems unlikely. Instead the Police will visit these activists and round them all up. Gordon Brown said "My little fact finding mission to Harare has proved quite useful. If we let the Police loose then I confidently predict that there will be no opposition in this country within two years."

More will not follow as the police have refused to allow further comment.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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