Written by Skoob1999
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Tuesday, 30 December 2008

image for Newcastle Blurk Upset By Israeli Action
Bombing Ex England Internationals Is Just Not Reet Says Wor Jackie

Newcastle man Wor Jackie today expressed his outrage at Israeli military action which has blighted the holiday season for many.

An emotional Wor Jackie, slightly unsteady on his feet, told us:

'It's nevvah reet this. Yon Israelis bombing Gazza. I mean, what's Gazza evvuh dun tee the Israelis?

'We aall know wor Gazza's had his problems and that, but for the Israelis to start rainin bombs and that doon on him is just wrong.

'It's ruined me foggin Chrismuss this has. They ought to be ashamed o themsels. Mine's a pint by the way.'

Our reporting team weren't quite sure what Wor Jackie was babbling on about, as our contacts informed us that as far as they were aware Paul Gascoigne hasn't been anywhere near the Gaza strip.

Sadly we couldn't get Wor Jackie to expand on his statement as he had collapsed face down into a disused ashtray.

The smoking ban remains in force.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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