Written by Mrs Kensington
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Topics: Food, School

Tuesday, 19 August 2008

image for Marco Takes On School Dinners!
White - "Feeding crap to children is wrong"

Following his ground breaking television programmes 'Hell's Kitchen' and 'Marco's Great British Feast' noodle-haired chef, Marco Pierre White has revealed his next revolutionary project - improving school dinners.

"For too long we've been allowing schools to feed manufactured crap to our kids and it has to stop. Would we be happy to eat Turkey Twizzlers and burgers made out of cows noses? No fucking way! So why do we allow it to be forced down the throats of our children?"

At a press conference yesterday White, who resembles Tommy Cooper in real life, outlined plans to meet with Government officials to discuss increasing food budgets for schools and beginning an intensive programme of training for the nation's dinner ladies.

"I don't go out of my way to be a trend-setter" growled the rustic cook, who has very large hands. "Some people are born to lead and others to follow. I invented the bandana at the age of 10, I'll leave you to decide which category I belong to".

When a junior reporter from BBC's Newsround asked if he realised that the bandana was actually invented by Bruce Springsteen he just stared at him.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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